Anger is a surface emotion. I often liken it to an iceberg. What we see above the surface of the water is just the tip, aka anger, but look below the and there is a enormous mountain of ice. It is what is below the surface that is the cause of our anger and there can be many names and reasons; hurt, despair, pain, anxiety, sadness, deficiency, guilt, shame, disgust, fear etc.
Anger just does not occur for no reason. We need one of these “below the surface,” trigger feelings to arise. It is our nature to not want to feel these uncomfortable emotions. Some of us become so adept at avoiding our feelings that we or someone we know appears constantly angry.
If you find yourself becoming angry ask yourself these questions: What feelings am I avoiding? How many feelings can I name that accompany this “angry” feeling? What am I really looking for or what do I need to feel at peace? How can I express my feelings, however painful, in order to grow and become more self aware?